Enough with the Kid’s Games

Much of that which goes by the name of actor training is an entire waste of time. It is pointless games and exercises, with little point beyond amusing and bemusing the participants.

These are activities that are often intended to help the actor to ‘believe’ in the stage reality, the theatrical truth, the scenic truth, or any truth you can think of, except perhaps the actual truth of the moment.

The trouble is… (that’s my favourite phrase) that exercises that attempt to teach the actor to delude themselves have NO, and I mean ZERO practicable application after the exercise is over. None. ZERO.

These are childrens games that only teach the actor to bend to the will of the teacher. And up and down the country, in universities, colleges, conservatories and acting schools, these games are taught to clueless acting students who are never taught HOW they are meant to help, or how to apply them after the party is over.

And you actors, you part with your money, comply with the silly games, do them, enjoy them, guiltily ignore your common sense thoughts which are screaming BULLSHIT! Or maybe you’re not, because even those outside our profession are entirely inured to the idea that taking part in these voodoo rituals is how actors do what they do.

But here’s the thing. It’s not. It’s horseshit, I wouldn’t even waste the bullshit on it.

My classes contain none of this cock and bull shenanigans. We train actors to act, not to self-delude. The only truth worth working towards is the compelling and captivating truth of the moment. It’s beautiful, it’s unique and it sets all that pretending crap on its ass over and over again.

The games don’t work, not only don’t they work, they’re a form of abuse, they’re forcing actors to do something that is in the end, not good for them. And yet pages and pages and books and books and schools full of teachers are forcing poor actors to jump through ridiculous and humiliating hoops, or even putting them through highly enjoyable exercises that cannot help them.

It’s so frustrating to have to explain to actors that they have to start from scratch with us, because all of their training has prepared them for nothing when it comes to actually learning the craft of the actor, that hours spent pretending to be the colour purpose, were entirely wasted.

These games and exercises are an insult to your intelligence because they don’t teach acting, they teach compliance. Everyone knows that they’re crap, but admitting it is to admit that our training was poor, and that we were lying to ourselves and others when we told people we found it ‘useful’.

As the blog from a few weeks ago reminded us, the Emperor is naked. But imagine if all those authors, teachers, directors had to admit that their craft was crap! They can’t do it, because it is to admit they are unfit to do the job they have been entrusted with.

And that makes them charlatans. And you were lied to. And you knew it. And you went along with it anyway. They made you complicit with their horseshit.

It’s time to stand up and say enough with the kid’s games. Let’s learn to act!

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You’re either SWAT, or you’re NOT

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Some of my favourite acting performances